Lesson 4: Communicating with God

“I will know God better because I communicate with him in prayer.”

To understand that our relationship with God is expressed in our communication with him.

The practice of prayer is one of the marks of a Christian. However, it is possible for a person to have a custom of prayer that is not true Christian prayer. Sometimes a person has the wrong reason for praying.

► What kind of situation might cause a person to pray who has not prayed before?

A person may pray for the first time because of a crisis (even nonreligious soldiers will pray when under fire), or because he thinks that prayer will get him what he wants. The fact that a person is interested in prayer may not mean that he is interested in being saved and knowing God. He may be interested only in getting things from God by prayer.

Many people are interested in spirits, angels, and psychic powers for benefits in business and health. People are not sure that science has all the answers, and they look to the supernatural for help. This search for benefits from the supernatural sometimes takes the forms of pagan idolatry or the occult.

Some people think that prayer has power like a magical formula. They consider prayer worthwhile only to the extent that it manipulates God to give them what they want.

► People of other religions also pray. How is a Christian’s praying different from a pagan’s?

An important distinctive of Christian prayer is that we submit to the will of God rather than just trying to get God to do what we want.

The pagan tends to think that his prayer is only for getting a supernatural power to do what he wants. Many people take a pagan approach to prayer, praying only when they need something or have a crisis. They try to get God to do their will, instead of trying to find out what his will is.

As Christians we trust the will of God to be better for us than our own desires. We know that because God has perfect wisdom and perfect love, the will of God is the best thing that can happen to us. So, though in prayer we ask for what we think we need, we leave the choice to God ‒ not just because we must, but because we trust him.

We must pray specifically to have answers to prayer. If we always pray vaguely, we won’t often see specific responses of God to our prayers. We talk to God about our needs, letting him show us how we should see them. As we pray for the solution, he helps us to know what to pray for.

Prayer is not just turning in a list of requests; it is interaction with God. As we tell him about our needs, we trust him to meet those needs his own way. Sometimes he shows us what he wants to do.

A Christian values his relationship with God more than what he gets from God.

What we seek most in prayer is God himself.

There was once a great saint who is now remembered as Saint Bernard. Bernard of Clairvaux said, “Our time with God, and the priority we give it, are the true measurement of our love for him.” Love exists in a relationship, and the relationship is expressed in communication. A relationship cannot grow without communication and declines if communication is neglected.

How would you feel if you had a friend who talked to you only when he wanted something from you? What if he seemed to have no interest in knowing you better or in hearing about your interests and concerns? You wouldn’t call that a good relationship, but many people have a relationship with God like that.

Our love for God is not measured by how much we work for him (though love for him should motivate us) or by the strictness of our lifestyle (though love for him should cause us to carefully guard ourselves from sin). An employee who focuses on his work but does not want to see his employer or talk to him probably has a bad relationship with the one he is working for. Our relationship with God should be better than that.

Communication can be on various levels. In a shallow relationship it consists mainly of clichés, phrases repeated from habit. A deeper relationship will have communication of opinions and feelings. The best relationship has total honesty.

So it seems that Bernard was right. Our prayer life does measure our love for God, just as any relationship is measured by the communication in it.

Our spiritual life exists in our relationship with God, and prayer is a sign of spiritual life.

One of the signs that Saul the persecutor had changed was that he had begun to pray (Acts 9:11).[1]

► When a paramedic comes to the rescue of someone who is seriously injured, what does he do first?

He first checks “vital signs” (signs of life), such as heart rate and breathing. He is looking for signs of physical life. There are also spiritual vital signs. Prayer is a sign of spiritual life.

Prayer is the breath of the soul—a spiritual vital sign.

We breathe in spiritual life from God and breathe back praise and worship, expressed especially in our praying. How long can a person live physically without breathing? How long can a person live spiritually without praying?

► When should you pray?

• Pray when you are starting the day.

• Pray at a special time scheduled every day.

• Pray when you are especially tested.

• Pray when you have failed.

• Pray when you should thank God for something.

1. Christian prayer differs from pagan prayer because we want God’s will, and we value knowing God more than we value what we get from him.

2. Prayer is a measurement of our love for God.

3. Prayer is a spiritual “vital sign” showing that we are spiritually alive.

Discuss the truth that in prayer we should seek God himself more than the things we get from God. Ask the students:

► Do you really pray with that priority? How does it show?

Invite responses to the concept that our prayer life demonstrates our love for God. Ask if that causes some uncomfortable self-evaluation, with a question like:

► Do you feel that your love for God could really be measured by your prayer life?

► Do you feel that your love for God is greater than your prayer life shows?

Ask for some resolutions:

► For my prayer life to better demonstrate and increase my love for God, I should...

Heavenly Father,

Thank you for the great privilege I have to talk to you. I’m glad that I can talk to you about my needs. But, most of all, I thank you for the privilege I have to know you.

Help me to show my love for you by talking to you often. Make my love for you grow because I am beginning to know you better.

Help me to make my time with you the greatest priority in my life.

Amen

Look at the statements that Jesus made about prayer in Matthew 6:5-18. List the references to personal needs and references to relationship with God.