Lesson 12: Personal Discipline: Appetite, Time, Temperament, Personal Convictions

Note to class leader: Review the areas of personal discipline learned in Lesson 11. Ask students who are willing to share their personal prayers from Lesson 11.

By the end of this lesson, the student should:

(1) Understand the importance of personal discipline to being formed into the image of Christ.

(2) Have a more practical understanding of how to train his/her appetite, time, and temperament, and how to put these disciplines into practice.

(3) Learn the importance of developing personal convictions.

A Pastor

While working on this course, I enjoyed fellowship with an elderly pastor friend. During our conversation, he confessed that his greatest struggle throughout his life and ministry has been slothfulness. “I’m tempted to sleep too much and to pray too little!” he admitted. When I feel discouraged or bored, rather than pray or study, I take long naps, more than necessary.” The good news is that my friend is still tender and seems committed to letting the Lord transform him. One evening, shortly after our conversation, he spoke to his congregation about his intention to become a man of prayer. He realizes that following through with this commitment will not be easy but will require personal discipline enabled by the Holy Spirit.

A Mother

A young mother we once tried to disciple was quite unstable spiritually. She had a sincere hunger for God, but her lack of personal discipline caused grief to herself and her family. Laundry would pile up, and dirty dishes would fill the sink and cover the countertop before she would wash them. Her devotional life was very irregular. She was unhealthy due to poor eating habits and a lack of exercise. Her husband and children were uncared for. By her own admission, her lack of self-discipline made her spiritual life very unsatisfying. After years of struggle, she finally became serious about personal discipline, and her story began to change.

Growing in the image of Christ cannot be separated from personal discipline. In this lesson and the last lesson, we are discussing areas where personal training or discipline is vital to spiritual formation:

1. Speech
2. Thought life, including sexual desires
3. Appetite
4. Temperament
5. Time
6. Personal convictions

We have examined the first two of these personal disciplines. In this lesson, we will talk about the last four.

Success in the Christian life – bearing the image of Jesus Christ – is directly related to how effective we are at “mastering ourselves.” Personal discipline will increase our happiness in God as well as our ability to glorify God and advance his gospel. The life of David illustrates this.

As a young shepherd boy, David mastered the harp, the sling, and poetry. These little masteries opened doors to greater influence and provided opportunities beyond his imagination. The harp brought him before the king; the sling won him honor, and eventually a kingdom; and through his poetry, he still encourages, influences, and helps shape the devotional lives of millions every single day.

Perhaps you are tempted to think that little things don’t really matter, but they do. Faithfulness in the little things matters. Amy Carmichael challenged her readers, “Everything is important, even the tiniest thing. If you do everything, whether great or small, for the sake of the Lord, then you will be ready to do whatever work he has chosen for you to do later.”

Personal discipline is not as easy as we wish it were! One day my wife, Becky, disciplined one of our daughters, Carrie, for getting angry at her sister. Carrie was only three or four years old at the time. “You really need to ask the Lord to help you gain self-control,” Becky said. Carrie disappeared into her room and reappeared a few minutes later with a big smile on her face! “Why are you smiling, honey? Why are you so happy?” her mommy asked. “Because I prayed for self-control!” she said. Like many Christians, Carrie thought self-control was something God would instantly give her; but, as Carrie’s father, I have since observed that he didn’t!

► Do you see a tendency within the church to seek instant maturity in areas that will likely require years of personal discipline?

There is this idea that disciplined people are serious and joyless. It depends on how we look at it. When Olympic athletes practice their sport, they certainly endure their share of pain; but they do it for the joy of competition and the chance to wear a gold medal. When a farmer cultivates the soil and plants the seeds, he endures his share of pain; but he does it for the joy of harvest: “He who continually goes forth weeping, bearing seed for sowing, shall doubtless come again with rejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him.”[1] And when Christians discipline themselves spiritually and personally, they do so because it leads to a life that flourishes in God. We should never pity a disciplined man or woman. By the grace of God, they are getting the most out of life.

[1] Psalm 126:6

Without question, appetite is one of the most difficult of all personal disciplines; especially when it comes to food. Food is provided by God not only to sustain life, but for our personal enjoyment. But, it was never meant to take his place. It was never meant to provide ultimate comfort and satisfaction. It doesn’t really matter if you live in a poor country or a more prosperous one, training your appetite is vital to spiritual progress.

In the West, some Christians have normalized a spirit of gluttony and self-indulgence. We continue to buy new pairs of shoes even though we have a dozen pair in our closet! We live beyond our means and go into debt. We choose “all you can eat” restaurants so that we can gorge ourselves. But the Scriptures are clear, “And everyone who competes for the prize is temperate in all things.”[1]

Why Mastering Our Appetite Is Vital to Spiritual Formation

(1) Our appetites determine the direction of our lives: “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”[2]

Jesus taught that we always seek the things we crave ‒ whether it be the cravings of our stomachs, the passionate desire for sex, possessions, or power, or the longings of our hearts for God. Our hearts are formed by the things we choose to value. If you are a man or woman who has a tendency to overindulge, you should know that it is hindering your spiritual progress.

Proverbs says, “And put a knife to your throat if you are a man given to appetite.”[3] John Wesley paraphrased this verse, “Restrain thine appetite, as if a man stood with a knife at thy throat”![4] This is the same kind of radical self-restraint Jesus taught regarding sexual temptations.[5] Gluttony is not just a food problem. Gluttony by definition is simply consuming more than is needed; and thus, it is an attitude which can be applied to any appetite, whether it be food, money, possessions, or power.

(2) Over-indulgence in any good thing will diminish our satisfaction with what is best: “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled.”[6]

Preoccupation with natural appetites will leave less room in our minds for eternal things. As John Piper puts it: “If we don’t feel strong desires for the manifestation of the glory of God... it is because we have nibbled so long at the table of the world. Our soul is stuffed with small things, and there is no room for the great.”[7]

When I was a boy, my favorite time of the day was supper time! Actually, it still is! The anticipation of delicious, home-cooked meals and the fellowship and laughter of my wife and children around the table are some of the greatest joys of life. But there have been times, especially in my youthful days, when my impatient snacking before supper has spoiled the purest enjoyment of it. I eat, but not with the same depth of satisfaction. There is a lesson here: Impatience takes away a sense of anticipation, which makes eating more enjoyable; and self-indulgence – too much of a good thing – robs Christians of a sense of spiritual satisfaction.

(3) If hunger for food is too strong, it will block our spiritual vision.

In John 4, while the disciples went into Samaria to buy food, Jesus led a thirsty soul to salvation. When the disciples came back, they urged Jesus to eat; but he said, “I have food to eat which you do not know.... My food is to do the will of him who sent me, and to finish his work.”[8] Jesus needed food to live, just like the disciples; but he was training his disciples not to allow their appetites to blind them to the Spirit’s work all around them. He taught them that doing what pleases the Father is far more satisfying than the best take-out lunch.

Nothing should dominate our minds but the things of God. In the context of food and sexual desire—however this is applicable to all appetites—Paul said, “All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.”[9]

In the Scriptures the deadly sins of gluttony and drunkenness are said to flow from the same spring of self-indulgence.

► Look up Deuteronomy 21:20 and Proverbs 23:21. How seriously do you think most people take the sin of gluttony?

Practical Advice to Help Us Restrain Our Appetites

1. Serve others before yourself. This is a great way to battle self-indulgence.
2. Discipline yourself toward moderation in all things.
3. Avoid situations, people, or locations which tempt you to overindulge your appetites.
4. Discipline yourself toward faithful stewardship of your health and resources.
5. Practice fasting, as taught in the lessons on the spiritual disciplines. Hungering for God – fasting – is one of the best disciplines for quenching the fires of appetite that burn.
6. Let your motive for restraint and moderation be the enjoyment of God! Remember that personal discipline should never be an end in itself but a means to more enjoyment of eternal things.

[1] 1 Corinthians 9:25

[2] Matthew 6:21

[3] Proverbs 23:2

[4] John Wesley’s notes on Proverbs 23:2

[5] Matthew 5:28-30

[6] Matthew 5:7

[7] John Piper’s book, A Hunger for God, (Wheaton: Crossway, 2013) is a great resource.

[8] John 4:32-34

[9] 1 Corinthians 6:12-13

“He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city;”[1] “Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls.”[2]

People who study human behavior have taught us that every person is a unique combination of personality and temperament. Various personality traits have sometimes been defined as follows:[3]

Extroversion and Introversion

• Extroverts love being around people but tend to make themselves the center of attention.
• Introverts are more reflective and enjoy solitude but tend to withdraw from much-needed fellowship.

Sensing and Intuition

• Sensing persons like routine and details and systematic ways of doing things but struggle with flexibility.
• Intuitive persons are problem solvers and do not enjoy repetitive activity but struggle with patience and follow-through.

Thinking and Feeling

• Thinking persons are analytical, logical, and reasonable but struggle with sensitivity to others.
• Feeling persons are sensitive to how others feel but tend to be people pleasers.

Judging and Perceiving

• Judging persons like order and control but struggle with impatience and anger.
• Perceiving persons are laid back and relaxed but struggle with procrastination.

Every person must bring their personality and temperament under the control of the Holy Spirit. Apart from the fruit of self-control, empowered by the Holy Spirit, our weaknesses will dominate our lives and destroy our unique potential to glorify God.

Practical Advice for Gaining Self-Discipline in the Area of Temperament

1. Study the life of Jesus and conform your behavior to his, by the Holy Spirit. The more we become like him, the more our personality and temperament will be sanctified.
2. Know yourself and refuse to make excuses for offending your brothers and sisters in Christ. Be humble. Don’t be discouraged by failure but keep seeking grace.
3. Be grateful for the person God created you to be, and give thanks for the personality and temperaments of others.

► Ask members of your group to name some of the personality and temperament strengths and weaknesses of biblical characters. Which traits of their temperament and personality do you think needed to be sanctified, and which traits would never be sanctified?

[1] Proverbs 16:32

[2] Proverbs 25:28

[3] M. Robert Mulholland Jr., Invitation to a Journey (Downers Grove: InterVarsity Press, 1993), 50-56

“Do you see a man who excels in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before unknown men.”[1] “As a door turns on its hinges, so does the lazy man on his bed.”[2]

Discipline of Time: Pursue What Is Excellent

Discipline in the matter of time doesn’t mean that we fill every moment with busy activity, but that we learn to fill every moment with the most excellent good: “And this I pray ... that you may approve the things that are excellent.”[3] If the most excellent thing you can do at a certain moment is simply sleeping, then sleep. Don’t scroll aimlessly through the internet. If the most excellent thing is sitting in silent meditation or prayer, then do that, rather than something less. If the most excellent thing at a certain moment is worship, or study, or reading, or practicing your guitar, or writing, or washing clothes, or learning a second language, or preaching the gospel, then discipline yourself to do that most excellent thing. If the most excellent thing you can do is give tender care to your sick child, cook a meal, provide income for your family, build a house, converse with a friend or colleague, or enjoy the beauties of God’s world ... whatever the most excellent things is at any given moment, train yourself to do it, rather than something else.

And we should add to this, that to redeem the time means that whatever our hand finds to do, we do it with all our might, in the name of the Lord Jesus, with thanksgiving, and for his glory. If we train ourselves to do this, we will redeem our short days on earth.

1. With all our might – “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might.”[4]
2. In the name of the Lord Jesus, with thanksgiving – “And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”[5]
3. For God’s glory – “Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”[6]

This is a very high standard that very few reach, I’m sure. But this is the kind of discipline we should be striving for.

Discipline of Time: Do What God Has Uniquely Called and Equipped You to Do

Jesus did only those things his Father had uniquely called him to do.[7] He went where the Father asked him to go and said what the Father asked him to say. He is our model in time management.

Too many “Davids” waste time trying to wear Saul’s armor[8] or forcing themselves to copy what successful people have done. I’ve done it myself. I well remember the time in my early pastoral ministry that I attended a seminar where a successful pastor challenged us to go house to house and invite people to church. This was the secret of his success, it seemed, so I felt like I should do it, too (even though in America most people are very unfriendly toward strangers who knock on their doors). I forced myself out the door one Saturday morning in terror. Perhaps this is what it means to take up my cross and follow Jesus, I thought. I went to a nearby neighborhood and hoped no one would be home. I walked up and down the street trying to build up courage; but, after about an hour, I went home totally defeated without meeting even one person! It took me awhile in ministry to learn that while obedience to Jesus often takes us out of our comfort zone, he rarely, if ever, takes us out of our gifting zone.

Don’t allow yourself to be pressured to do good things that are not the right things for you, things you are not called or qualified to do. Think of the early apostles in Acts chapter six who were distracted by the good of serving tables, when they should have been focused on Jesus’ calling to prayer and the ministry of God’s Word: “But we will give ourselves continually to prayer and to the ministry of the word.”[9]

► Ask someone in your group to share a time when they felt pressured to copy someone else’s spiritual gift. What was the result?

Discipline of Time: Plod – Work without Thrills

This generation is a generation of thrill seekers, but those who do the most good in the world keep doing right even when there is no thrill in it. No matter what you do, eventually the excitement of something new turns to drudgery. We are no longer driven and motivated by desire, and that’s where discipline comes in. Some time ago I endured a season of intense boredom! Ministries which once used to excite me now seemed dreadfully hard. The challenge just wasn’t there like it once was. The taste for life had turned bitter. I think everyone understands this temptation. The Christian life often requires grit! In the midst of my boredom, I came across this timely word from Oswald Chambers about walking:

"The word 'walk' is used in the Bible to express the character of a person.... When we are in an unhealthy condition, either physically or emotionally, we always look for thrills in life."[10]

The Christian life is more about walking than anything else.

• “I say then: walk in the Spirit.”[11]
• “And walk in love.”[12]
• “But if we walk in the light….”[13]

Walking speaks much more of patient constancy than running. What pleases him is a life of consistency, faithfulness, and disciplined resolve even when there is little to inspire. Walking is tough. Walking requires patience and perseverance. “To them who by patient continuance in well doing seek for glory and honor and immortality, eternal life:”[14] Walking builds character. Walking makes us better disciples and will accomplish some purpose of God in our spiritual lives. This discipline makes us more contented.

The kingdom advances through plodders, not thrill seekers. William Carey, great missionary to India, whose translations of Scripture were used to bring millions into the kingdom of God, said that the secret to his success was that he had learned to plod: “I can plod. I can persevere in any definite pursuit. To this I owe everything.”

Mrs. Charles E. Cowman, missionary and devotional writer, observed in Streams in the Dessert: “The glory of tomorrow is rooted in the drudgery of today. Many want the glory without the cross, the shining without the burning; but crucifixion comes before coronation.”[15]

It’s those who learn to faithfully plod through the drudgery of life today who will enjoy the best God has to offer tomorrow. The plodders will be the happy harvesters: “He who continually goes forth weeping, bearing seed for sowing, shall doubtless come again with rejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him.”[16] Learn the discipline of focusing right now on your present duties rather than daydreaming about the future or coveting what you can’t have, and you’ll be a more happy Christian.

Some Practical Advice for Self-Discipline in the Area of Time

(1) Sacrifice the good for the excellent.

Good is the enemy of the best. Ask the Lord to open your eyes to activities which are not best for you, activities which are not productive personally or spiritually. Ask him to make you willing to let go of the good things for the sake of the best things. Open your heart to the thought that too much time on sports, or TV and movies, or news, or shopping might be robbing you of activities which lead to greater joy: the perfecting of your gift, fellowship with the Lord, nurturing your marriage, the enjoyment of your children, Christian service, or physical exercise.

(2) Prayerfully form plans and goals.

One of the greatest weaknesses of many Christian men and women, both young and old, is that they wander aimlessly through everyday life without clear goals. Prayerful goal setting can be a very spiritual exercise – one which keeps us focused.

After high school, my oldest son, Timothy, decided to take a year off before attending college. My wife and I said that we were okay with this decision as long as he had some specific goals he would strive toward. He took the challenge; and as a way to help him form healthy goals, I created this simple growth plan.

Click here to download a PDF containing this table.

(This may also be found in the Appendix for future reference.)

Intentional Growth Plan

Honestly, the most Spirit-filled men and women I know go about their lives in an orderly way. One of the important ministries of the Holy Spirit in our lives is to bring order to our chaos. To the degree that we cooperate with the Holy Spirit, to that degree our thoughts, words, behavior, and surroundings will be ordered.

Not that every minute or hour is planned, but that they have a clear focus and direction in life. In those seasons when things are not so clear, they wait expectantly on the Lord for direction.

(3) Do the next thing that needs to be done, promptly.

"I went by the field of a lazy man... and there it was, all overgrown with thorns.... When I saw it, I considered it well; I looked on it and received instruction: A little slumber, a little folding of hands to rest; so shall your poverty come like a prowler, and your need like an armed man."[17]

During our first few years of ministry, Becky and I would listen as often as possible to Elizabeth Elliot’s radio broadcast, Gateway to Joy. Of all the missionary stories she told and all the wisdom she presented, nothing helped us more than her oft repeated counsel, “Do the next thing.” What she meant by this was that rather than thinking about our boring or less than desirable situation, we should set our mind and effort on the next task ‒ especially if that task seems small and insignificant. If the clothes need to be washed; if there is a book we should read or a letter we should write; if our finances need to be organized; if we should study for a message; if the garden needs to be weeded; if there is one we should counsel; if our children or spouse needs our love, affection, and attention; or if a lightbulb needs to be changed; if there is anything we can do to make life more pleasant for another, then we should do that thing.

We must develop the discipline of doing what needs to be done, promptly, especially when there’s no excitement in doing it. We must learn to do hard things, first.

(4) Remember that faithfulness in time leads to joy.

For everything there is a season,[18] including the seasons of pleasure. God-timed and God-granted pleasures are always more fulfilling and rewarding than those we have sought for ourselves.

I was a twenty-six-year-young pastor in my third year of ministry, and the devil had almost convinced me that I would never accomplish anything for God. I was in despair. I was confused. I felt trapped. For months. I had carried such a weight on my chest that, honestly, at times I even wished to die. One day, the Holy Spirit gave me the grace to look heavenward and say, “Father, I don’t know what you have in store for me and Becky. I don’t know if you want us to stay in the pastoral ministry, or if you will someday open up a door to cross-cultural ministry for us. But, Father, I consecrate myself anew to you and to your perfect will, whatever and wherever it may be.” I also promised the Lord that day that no matter how tempting it was, I would never try to open a door on my own, but would trust in his power to align the hearts of men with his will. God heard this prayer of fresh consecration and the very next day called our family, with undeniable certainty, into missionary service. We knew that this was what God had been preparing us for.  

[1] Proverbs 22:29

[2] Proverbs 26:14

[3] Philippians 1:9-10

[4] Ecclesiastes 9:10a

[5] Colossians 3:17

[6] 1 Corinthians 10:31

[7] John 8:29

[8] 1 Samuel 17:38-39

[9] Acts 6:1-4

[10] Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest (July 20 entry). Retrieved from https://utmost.org/dependent-on-god%E2%80%99s-presence/ on January 16, 2021.

[11] Galatians 5:16

[12] Ephesians 5:2

[13] 1 John 1:7

[14] Romans 2:7, emphasis added.

[15] Mrs. Charles E. Cowman, Streams in the Dessert (April 26 entry). Retrieved from https://annointing.files.wordpress.com/2013/01/devotional-streams-in-the-desert.pdf on January 16, 2021.

[16] Psalm 126:6

[17] Proverbs 23:30-34

[18] Ecclesiastes 3:1

“All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful; all things are lawful for me, but not all things edify.”[1]

One of the signs of maturity is that we no longer ask, “What does the law allow?” or “What can I get by with?” but instead start asking, “Is this helpful to me?” and “Will this bring me closer to God or make me a better follower of Christ?” One of the most important disciplines is the formation of personal boundaries and convictions in our lives ‒ boundaries and convictions related to personal purity, friendships, dress, music, entertainment, the Lord’s Day, and others.

Points to Remember about Convictions and Personal Boundaries

(1) These specific convictions and personal boundaries are not necessarily for everyone.

We might not be able to find a specific verse for them in the Bible, except in principle. So we must never demand them of others or use our convictions to judge others.

(2) These personal boundaries and convictions are based on biblical principles, but the specific applications are unique to you.

As the Lord makes you aware of your weaknesses, you develop personal boundaries and convictions which will help preserve your passion for God.

(3) These personal boundaries and convictions must be formed in love for others.[2]

There are plenty of times in our Christian walk that we will limit our freedoms for the sake of love. Mature Christians are willing to lay down their rights in this way.

(4) Personal boundaries and convictions must be motivated by joy.

Thoughtlessly following church tradition or the convictions of good people, when those convictions are not in your heart, will only lead to bondage. George Mueller has a very good word for us here:

"I have often remarked the (harmful) effects of doing things because others did them, or because it was the custom, or because they were persuaded into acts of outward self-denial, or giving up things whilst the heart did not go along with it, and whilst the outward act was NOT the result of the inward powerful working of the Holy (Spirit), and the happy entering into our fellowship with the Father and with the Son.

"Everything that is a mere form, a mere habit... is to be dreaded exceedingly.... Things should not result from without, but from within. The sort of clothes I wear, the kind of house I live in, the quality of the furniture I use ‒ all such like things should not result from other persons doing so and so, or because it is customary among those brethren with whom I associate to live in such and such a simple, inexpensive, self-denying way; but whatever be done in these things, in the way of giving up, or self-denial, or deadness to the world, should result from the joy we have in God, from the knowledge of our being the children of God, from the entering into the preciousness of our future inheritance."[3]

Be sure that your convictions spring from freedom, rather than enslavement to man-made rules and traditions.[4]

Practical Advice for the Discipline of Personal Boundaries and Convictions

1. Know yourself.
2. Seek counsel from other faithful Christians.
3. Do not form boundaries and convictions hastily or thoughtlessly.
4. Do not make foolish vows you cannot keep.
5. Be motivated by love.
6. Realize that some convictions will change over time as you develop in spiritual strength and maturity. Only God’s Word is permanent!

The prophet Daniel is a beautiful example of a man who, in the early days of his Babylonian captivity, established some personal “customs”: “Now when Daniel knew that the writing was signed, he went home. And in his upper room, with his windows open toward Jerusalem, he knelt down on his knees three times that day, and prayed and gave thanks before his God, as was his custom since early days.”[5]

Open windows toward Jerusalem? Kneeling three times a day? These were not commanded in the Scriptures, but Daniel had established them because he wanted to preserve his affection for God, God’s people, and God’s city. Daniel went beyond law, to love. This is why God used him so powerfully.

[1] 1 Corinthians 10:23

[2] Romans 14:13-19

[3] I do not know where I originally got this, but it can be found on the following web page: https://goodnessofgodministries.wordpress.com/2010/07/09/the-wise-sayings-of-george-mueller/ September 12, 2020.

[4] Galatians 5:1

[5] Daniel 6:10, emphasis added.

To be formed into the image of Christ, we must focus on personal discipline. We must make our minds and bodies our servants. I overheard one of my children express one day (when I had given them some unpleasant work to do), “I just wish I had a servant!” I told them that if they would make themselves their servant, they would always have one!

► Which of the personal disciplines discussed in the last two lessons have you found most helpful? Why? Take five minutes to reflect on some of the changes you need to make. Share one or two things with your group if you like.

(1) Take a test based on the material from this lesson.

(2) Spend at least thirty minutes this week reviewing this lesson, including the Scripture references, asking the Holy Spirit for insight.

(3) Record in your journal any specific changes that ought to be made in your life, as the Lord reveals them to you.

(4) Meditate on at least one Psalm in your daily devotional time, and record in your journal what the psalmist says about the nature and character of God.

(5) Record in your journal a personal prayer for spiritual transformation and growth based on this lesson.

(6) Practice using Dr. Brown’s Daily Prayer Guide in your daily private prayer.

(1) What are the six personal disciplines we’ve been learning about in Lessons 11 and 12?

(2) What are two negative results of over-indulgence?

(3) What does Proverbs 16:32 say about the person who is slow to anger?

(4) What did missionary statesman William Carey say was the secret to his success?

(5) Share in your own words the good counsel of George Mueller regarding personal convictions.