Lesson 18: A Small Group Manual

This lesson is not set up as a class session like the others. You can teach through it, and there are many topics for discussion. It may be necessary to meet more than once for this lesson.

The class should take time to especially discuss their future actions. They should be planning together how they can help their local churches with the tasks of evangelism and discipleship.

Small group ministry takes many forms around the world. There are many types of small groups, designed for different purposes. Small groups may meet for study, spiritual accountability, ministry, prayer, or special projects.

Some churches are divided into groups that meet in homes. The groups function like small churches. The churches of the New Testament apparently functioned like this.

Growing, effective churches usually have some kind of small group system.

In this section, we will talk about the effectiveness of small groups for discipleship.

John Wesley (Great Britain, 18th century) was not the first to organize small groups, but he developed a system that was highly effective.

Wesley developed a system of discipleship with various sizes of groups called societies, classes, and bands.[1] Wesley’s methods were not a complete system at the beginning, but were developed gradually to meet needs. Many of Wesley’s converts asked for encouragement, advice, and prayer. Because there were so many, he arranged for them to meet every Thursday.

In each place that Wesley and his preachers took the gospel, they organized converts into groups that met regularly. Because the congregations were large, many could not tell about personal spiritual needs and were not getting the attention they needed. Smaller groups were formed called classes, where leaders served as pastors to encourage and guide the members. Any member who continued in open sin and did not change was removed from membership and not allowed to come to the meeting.

Groups smaller than classes were formed so members could share their spiritual struggles and provide each other with spiritual accountability. These small groups were called bands. In these meetings the leader would describe his own spiritual condition, then ask others searching questions concerning their condition, sins, and temptations. In these groups, the members were all of the same gender.

Wesley’s success caused the famous George Whitefield to make this statement: “My Brother Wesley acted wisely—the souls that were awakened under his ministry he joined in class, and thus preserved the fruit of his labor. This I neglected, and my people are as a rope of sand.” Wesley’s methods were continued by the American Methodist church in the early years, but both his discipleship principles and his doctrines have been neglected by modern Methodism.

[1] See “A Plain Account of the People Called Methodists,” in The Works of John Wesley, Volume VIII (Grand Rapids: Zondervan), 249-258.

The earliest church building that has been found was built at approximately A.D. 250. For the first two centuries, the church saw itself as people, not as a building or organization. The church is composed of the groups of believers that worship together, evangelize, and obey the Bible.

Small groups of people are the basic building blocks of every effective church structure. A small group discipleship program is not a new institution that will someday become obsolete. It is not a new method that may work in some places and not in others. Instead, small groups are the basic building blocks of the church. Ministry in small groups can be done in various ways to meet the challenges that any local church faces.

A church will not accomplish its purpose unless its people are regularly edified and trained in a setting more personal than the whole congregation or most Sunday schools.

A Caution

Small groups are only as spiritual as the people involved. If they are not committed disciples with the priority of pleasing God, living faithfully, and accomplishing the mission of the church, there are many ways for the group to go wrong.

To have spiritual accountability is to establish a relationship with a person or group to whom you report your spiritual condition, your success or failure in spiritual disciplines, and your commitments for development. They tell you when they think you are doing wrong. You tell them your commitments, and they ask you later if you are keeping your commitments.

The biblical basis for spiritual accountability in a healthy Christian community is more thoroughly explained in a previous section. Without spiritual accountability, we will not fulfill all of the commands of scripture; and we will neglect a means that God has designed for giving us grace.

"Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working (James 5:16)."

A person will not confess private faults except in a relationship that makes it easy. If he is not confessing to someone who is praying for his faults, he is neglecting the means God has designed for meeting those needs.

"Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ (Galatians 6:2)."

Unless we know someone very well, we do not know what his most serious burdens are. We cannot fulfill this scriptural command without being in a relationship that makes it possible.

"And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works (Hebrews 10:24)."

We are to examine one another closely with a motive of love in order to see what encouragement and reproofs are necessary. Encouragements will be shallow, and reproofs will be resisted unless we have a special relationship with the other person.

The following questions can help a person determine whether or not spiritual accountability is established in his life.

What relationships do I have which allow:

• Someone to help me bear my most serious burdens?
• Me to confess my faults to someone?
• Me to help someone bear his burdens?
• Someone to respond to my present spiritual condition?

Are there times:

• When there is nobody I can lean on?
• When I am glad that nobody knows my condition?
• I would be embarrassed to report my prayer time or Bible study time?

Most churches do not fulfill their responsibility of spiritual accountability unless they arrange a system for doing so. For many, that is a system of small groups.

Jesus demonstrated the priority of discipleship. From the beginning of his ministry he chose a few men who would receive the responsibility of guiding the church. He did not spend all of his time preaching to the thousands who followed him; instead, he was often taking time to train the twelve apostles. He extended his ministry through those that he trained.

A person who does discipleship should have the following characteristics. He may not excel in every quality, but should try to improve in them all. If he lacks any one of them, he will be much less effective.

[1]

(1) Spiritually mature

He should have the qualities of spiritual maturity described in a previous section. If he is not spiritually mature, he will not set a good example and will not have the experience he needs.

(2) Available

If his schedule is already too full and not well managed, he is not available for small group ministry. He must make it a priority.

(3) Reliable

He must be a person who fulfills his commitments. He must be able to keep appointments. He must be able to remember to hold others accountable for their commitments.

(4) Confident

He must believe that he is able to learn how to lead a group. If he has the ability but does not believe it, he first needs some guided experiences that will build his confidence.

(5) Able to resolve conflict

He needs to be able to keep the right attitude when people disagree and cause problems. He needs to be able to help resolve conflicts between others.

(6) Able to teach

Do people understand his explanations? A leader must be one who does not confuse people.

(7) Hungry for God’s Word

He must have an enjoyment of God’s Word, so he can invite others to enjoy it also. He must make the Bible important in his relationship with God.

(8) Dependent on God

He must realize that spiritual results can happen only by the work of the Holy Spirit. He must be ready to cooperate with the Holy Spirit. He must depend on anointing from God. He must not be confident that his explanations will succeed because of his ability alone.

(9) Ready to serve

He must be a person who feels that he is doing something valuable when he serves others. He should not be a person who wants to be served. He should not be looking for a ministry for the purpose of displaying his talents. He must be responsive to needs and ready to volunteer.

(10) Under spiritual authority

He should be spiritually accountable to someone. He should follow the direction of spiritual leaders.

(11) Faithful to the church

The group leader should be a committed member of a local church. The ministry of discipleship should cause people to appreciate the church and become more committed to it.

(12) Zealous to succeed

If he has zeal to succeed, he will not quickly give up. He will adapt to circumstances. He will look for information to help him be more effective. He will take initiative when there are problems or opportunities. He will have energy and enthusiasm.

(13) Doctrinally accurate

He should have a good foundation of biblical, evangelical doctrine.

(14) Trained for ministry

It is not necessary for ministry training to occur in an academic institution. Training starts with observation, as a believer sees how ministry is done. Training increases with participation, as he is given responsibilities under direction. Reading and study of good material is very important.

[1] “Though he did what he could to help the multitudes, he had to devote himself primarily to a few men, rather than to the masses, in order that the masses could at last be saved. This was the genius of his strategy.”
- Robert Coleman, The Master’s Plan

The best way for discipleship to happen is by a local church that understands the responsibility and priority of discipleship, working in unity.

Therefore, these directions are addressed to the leaders and committed members of a church.

If a church realizes that they need to do better at discipleship, they should first study the scriptures and points in this course about discipleship. Leaders can present the material. All the committed members of the church should be involved if possible, so they can share the vision.

A second part of development is to observe what the church is already doing. Most churches have some groups already operating, even if they have not purposely started a small group program. For example, there may be a group of musicians in the church that meets frequently. There may be a choir that practices. There may be a board of deacons. There may be Sunday school classes, and the Sunday school teachers may also form a group. The youth of the church may meet occasionally. Committees may exist to take care of various responsibilities. A group may form informally of people who work together on a project. There may be families of the church that occasionally get together for fellowship. There may be home Bible studies and prayer meetings.

These groups may not have formed for the purposes of discipleship or spiritual accountability, but they may help serve those purposes. Any church that has spiritual life already has some groups operating to support that life. When a church decides to improve its program for discipleship, it should examine the existing groups and discover what is happening, then think about how the purposes can be achieved better.

New groups may be needed. Maybe different kinds of groups are needed. There may be groups that give practical training for ministry. There may be groups that primarily study the Bible and pray. There may be small groups for serious spiritual accountability.

The purpose of the group determines who should be there and how the group should function. For example, a group for serious spiritual accountability should have fewer than 10 people. If the group is too large, confidentiality is reduced, sharing becomes shallow, greater control is necessary, less participation is possible, and attendance tends to be worse. The depth of the personal sharing will be limited if both men and women are present.

The purpose of the group determines whether or not it should be open to new members. If the purpose is spiritual accountability, it should not be adding new members after the group has met several times. Most people will not share about their spiritual condition until they feel secure with the others in the group. If the purpose of the group is to cover a series of lessons, it is not practical to be adding people throughout the series of meetings.

There may be a group for new converts.[1] It is important that a new convert not wait for several weeks to join a group. Therefore, this group needs a revolving series of lessons so that new people can join at any time. The leaders must realize that some new converts will drop out. The fact that some people leave the group does not mean the group is not doing well. Even though some will drop out, a new convert group should be open to new people.

If a group is for ministry training or deeper spiritual development, the group members must be people who desire to grow spiritually and are willing to commit to the goals of the group. If some of the members are not committed, the group will not do as well at achieving its purpose.

Most members must be recruited by personal invitation. Do not wait for people to ask to join.

Not everyone in the church will get involved in a small group program. If you are a leader in the church, do not drive people away by criticizing them for not being in a small group. Promote the group ministry by describing its benefits.

At the first meeting, make sure everyone understands the importance of the group. Share scripture and information that shows the importance of discipleship.

To help attendance, the group can be scheduled to meet for a certain number of weeks. Explain that the group is covering a specific series of lessons and tell them when the series will be finished. That way, each member knows exactly what he is committing to. Emphasize the need for perfect attendance. At the end of that time, the group can start again with those who want to continue.

[1] Shepherds Global Classroom offers a 26 lesson book for discipling new believers. This free resource, Cultivate Discipleship Lessons, is available for download at shepherdsglobal.org.

Andrew has been a believer for several years. He is a church member and helps in his church. He is concerned that his church does not have a plan for discipleship. He thinks the church should start small groups, but the leaders are not interested.

► What should Andrew do?

Andrew should talk to the church leaders and ask their approval to lead a small group. He should not criticize the ministry of the church, but instead describe the benefits that would come from the group. If the group does well, the church will begin to understand the benefits of that kind of ministry.

At the beginning of a group, there is excitement and expectation. Many members do not know exactly what to expect, but they hope to get help from the group.

The following directions will help the group to be effective and fulfill its purpose. There are important principles for the functioning of small groups. If the leader helps the group to follow these principles, he will reduce frustration and discouragement.

The first meeting may be different from the others because the group is learning how the meetings will be done. However, the first meeting will set the style for future meetings. If a person does not talk in the first meeting, he will expect to be silent in the future. If someone dominates the discussion, the group will expect future meetings to be dominated by the same person. If the meeting is disorderly, they will expect the same in the future. If the meeting is like a class with little participation, they will expect the same pattern.

Some members may drop out after a few meetings because the group is not what they expected. It is important to lead the meeting properly so that the members who were expecting the right things will not be disappointed.

(1) Schedule the group to meet weekly, if possible. Some may need help arranging child-care.

(2) The format of meetings should be (1) study time, then (2) sharing of personal needs for prayer, then (3) prayer.

If the group’s primary purpose is study, the study time may be long and the other parts short; but the three parts should still be included. If the purpose of the group is spiritual accountability, the study time may be short, but they should have some material that they are studying.

If a group has personal sharing and discussion but no lesson material to study, it will tend to become chaotic. It will be dominated by some members’ personalities. Lesson material makes them all respond to truth beyond what is in their own minds.

(3) Start and end the meetings on time.

If you start and end late, those who value their own time will start coming later or skip some of the meetings.

(4) Set the date when the group will end.

Members need to know how long their commitment is for. Normally, new members should not be allowed join the group after several meetings, unless the group is rotating lessons for new converts. If the group is studying a lesson series, the number of lessons may set the number of weeks they will meet. If they are meeting for spiritual accountability, they could set a period of six months. At the end, they can organize again. At that time some members may leave, and the group can consider whether or not to allow new members to join.

(5) When studying, emphasize a life-changing purpose rather than knowledge for its own sake.

A member will feel that the group is worthwhile if he is able to draw personal, specific applications from the study.

(6) Follow up on commitments.

If someone has shared a problem then agreed that he should take a certain course of action, ask at the next meeting if he has done what he said he would do.

(7) The leader should be available to meet with a member individually to give spiritual guidance.

Other members may also get together at other times for encouragement.

(8) Select a good meeting place.

It should be an informal meeting place with a home atmosphere. Seating should be as circular as possible, so that each member can see every other member’s face. This will encourage participation. Meet in a place where there will not be interruptions or distractions.

(9) Practice good listening habits.

Signs of good listening are eye contact, a concentrated expression, ignoring distractions, and responsiveness to the speaker’s humor or other emotions.

(10) Make sure no member is always silent.

Direct a question to a member who does not speak much (“What do you think about this, Caleb?”).

(11) Do not pressure a member to share something personal.

Instead, try to create an atmosphere where he will feel free to speak. Build a member’s confidence by giving him eye contact and commending something he says.

(12) Try to ask questions that they can answer to build their confidence.

If someone gives a wrong answer, try to affirm something good about the answer before critiquing it.

(13) Try to affirm every comment in some way before criticizing it.

(14) If someone has a tendency to talk too much and answer all the questions, find a way to limit him.

One way is to direct questions to specific members. Or you can ask, “What do the rest of you think?” In a discussion, you could say, “Let’s hear from someone who hasn’t spoken about this yet.”

If a member still talks too much, the leader could talk to him outside of the meeting. He could say something like this: “Caleb, you are a quick thinker and able to respond quickly in discussions, but I’m concerned that some of the others will not participate if we answer everything quickly. Can you help me get everyone involved?”

(15) Don’t let two or three members have their own discussion while ignoring the group.

If someone wants to keep arguing for a long time about something, tell him that the discussion will have to be finished later outside of the meeting.

(16) Don’t allow anyone to interrupt others.

Raise your hand, assertively stop the interrupter, and allow the first speaker to finish. Otherwise, a discussion will always be dominated by the less mannered members. People who are less assertive will feel frustrated that they cannot finish their sentences.

(17) Listen to complaints.

Any complaint may show a problem that can be corrected. Don’t ignore signs of dissatisfaction. If someone is dissatisfied with the group meeting, he may not understand the purpose, or he may have a valid complaint.

(18) If a member persistently acts hostile, disruptive, argumentative, or bored, he may not accept the goals of the group.

The group may not be what he expected. Talk to him privately to help him see the group’s purpose.

(19) The leader does not have to know the answer to every problem.

His role is not to have the answer to everything but to lead the group to bear burdens in prayer.

(20) Be flexible and patient with interruptions of the schedule.

Remember that the events in our lives are part of God’s development of us. A problem is an opportunity.

(21) If a member often takes the whole meeting to share his needs, offer to counsel him at another time.

Otherwise, the other members will feel that the meeting is being stolen from them. Do not let the group lose its purpose, unless the members agree together that the purpose should be changed.

(22) Don’t allow the discussions to become subversive.

Don’t let the group become a forum for criticizing the local church and other leaders.

(23) Remember that the effectiveness of the group depends on the power of God working through it.

The group is only a scriptural structure that God uses.